How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
