the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
