he thought i was a dude.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize