Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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