it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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