yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
