I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
