I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Randomize
