just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Randomize