at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
We left an ass print on the piano.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
