Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Randomize
