just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
