420 ftw
I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
