im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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