we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I need a burrito and a hug.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Randomize
