I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize