haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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