So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize