there was a trapeze. enough said
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize
