i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
