you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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