we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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