Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize