So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
