whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
