i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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