Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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