Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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