I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
