all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Randomize
