found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
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