Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
