Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize