That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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