Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Rumble strips road head = magical
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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