So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
