I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Randomize
