So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize