another moral hangover. fuck.
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
he shaved USA in his pubs
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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