and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
