are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
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I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
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I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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