I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
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