I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
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