I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
She's like a pop up book from hell.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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