I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize