I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
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