Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
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does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
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I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
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