just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
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