im gay
i know
yea but for you.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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