Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
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