i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
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