Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
